Monday, April 18, 2022

First day back blues

Morena, I am alone in the office (no complaints). I've missed my space. 
I have Binaural playing in one ear (the old switcharoo) as my ear buds are "battery low".... I'm very tearful this morning. Combination of noise (the tree people are chainsawing next to my room, and not saying "timber"), maple plunger coffee, study until 1am, "the little that he needs, is home", having Darth back (a search that went on for 11months), the carving truck coming this weekend for training, being cold ('tis the season), having work to do but no idea what I'm supposed to be doing - I've read all the files, I've written notes and questions, what else can I do when my TL is away for the week and the person I'm supposed to talk to isn't at work. 

So back to study? Yessireeeeee.....  

Major Depression disorder
5 or more symptoms over a 2 week period where there is a change in previous function. 1 symptoms must be depression or loss in pleasure. 
Symptoms - 1-9 (mind-map of my bedroom)
1. bedside table
2. mirror
3. pillow
4. alarm clock
5. iced coffee
6. perfume dresser (box of small things)
7. clothes drawer
8. stones on window sill 
9. me in bed - the most important (which I put last by accident and am too lazy to rearrange all my notes)

Lazy isn't the right word, but I couldn't think of a better one. 

I grab my phone from my bed side table, look in the mirror, adjust the pillows (make the bed), look at the time, drink iced coffee, spray some perfume, get my clothes out, open my curtains (see my stones), want to get back into bed. 

I think I've had too much coffee. My brain is racing now. I'm going to switch to the cultural assessment.  

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day 37

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